Jesus Loves Me… Even on My Breakdown Days

When motherhood feels like too much, and grace feels too far

It happened just the other day.

I was sitting in the living room, surrounded by half-folded clothes, dinner still not made (again), cobwebs on my ceiling fan, a day-old empty go-gurt packet still on the couch, a mess in every room, and the weight of motherhood pressing so heavily on my chest I could barely breathe.

One of my kids had just made a comment—raw, honest, but sharp—about how they “just want their mom back.”

And something in me shattered.

Cue the full-blown meltdown.

Am I ruining them? Is my anxiety and depression scarring them? Have I failed at being the mother I wanted to be? How do I protect them from becoming as broken as I feel?

Tears fell hard and fast as I sank to the floor and cried out silently, “God, please... help me.”

Breakdown Days Are Real - Not Just for Toddlers

Let me be honest. I don’t always feel strong. I don’t always feel joyful. And I definitely don’t always feel like the mom my kids deserve.

Some days I’m crushing motherhood. I make all the activities, hug the kids, speak kindly, and even find time to pray. Other days, I’m dodging judgmental glances from the teenagers, holding back tears in the pantry, and texting Jesus like,

“Do You even see me down here??”

But here’s what I’m learning:

Jesus doesn’t love the “put-together” version of me more than the hot mess version.

He loves me exactly where I am—even if that’s crying in the closet while reheating chicken nuggets for the third time this week.

But it’s on these breakdown days—when I feel the most undone—that I’m reminded of one beautiful truth:

He loves me right there, in it.

The one with tear-streaked cheeks and guilt sitting heavy on her heart.

When Guilt Speaks Loud, Grace Speaks Louder

There’s a Scripture I cling to on these days:

“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’”— 2 Corinthians 12:9

So, what you’re saying, Lord, is…You’re not shocked by my panic attacks, my parenting guilt, or the fact that I skipped another shower today?

Exactly.

God’s grace doesn’t show up when I finally have it together. It shows up when I’m sobbing into a basket of unmatched socks, wondering how I’ll ever raise emotionally whole children while feeling emotionally unraveled myself.

What If I’ve Already Done the Damage?

This is the part that hurts. It’s the question that comes for me in the quiet:

Have my low days left wounds?

Have my kids learned to tiptoe around my moods, thinking they’re responsible for my emotions?

Cue the guilt. The shame. The desire to be a completely different mom… by tomorrow morning.

But then God gently reminds me:

“You’re not their Healer. I am.”

I’m not their perfection.

I’m not their Savior.

I’m a human mom raising human kids with the help of a holy God.

And thankfully, He fills in every single gap my humanity leaves behind.

💛 Jesus Loves Me… Even Then

He loves me when I’m cheerful and when I’m curled up in a ball behind a locked bathroom door.

He loves me when I read a bedtime devotional and when I say, “Just go to sleep!” through clenched teeth.

He loves me when I bring the peace and when I am the storm.

For the Mama (or Human) Who's Spiraling Today

You are not too much.

You are not too broken.

You are not too late.

You are not alone.

Even on the days when you feel like a parenting disaster with a side of panic and shame—Jesus is there.

Not disappointed. Not distant. Present. Loving. Steady.

Final Words (before I go cry in the shower)

You may have felt like a failure today.

You may have yelled.

You may have spiraled.

You may have googled “Is it normal to want to run away for like… 3 hours or maybe 12?”

But Jesus still loves you. Not some future version of you. You. Today. Right now.

You are not disqualified by your breakdowns. You are deeply loved in the middle of them.

Faith doesn’t mean the feelings disappear. It just means we don’t carry them alone.

Even on the breakdown days. Especially on the breakdown days.

You are not defined by your feelings. You are held by a Savior who meets you right there—in the laundry pile, the locked bathroom, or the midnight overwhelm.

And He’s not going anywhere.

Blessings From Above!

Ready to take a next step toward healing and hope?

If you’re navigating anxiety, overwhelm, parenting stress, or just need a safe space to process life—you don’t have to walk alone. As a Certified Mental Health Coach and Christian Counselor, I offer faith-based, mental health coaching for women, men, moms, dads, teens etc. Whether you're battling burnout, rebuilding after a hard season, or simply trying to rediscover joy, I’m here to walk with you—honestly, gently, and prayerfully.

You don’t have to do this alone.

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